All is Well: A Journey in Contemplation

c. Getting Started

Where does this contemplative journey begin?  Maybe the first thing to recognise is that the journey has begun – you are already on the road.  If you’re reading this blog you’re already thinking about contemplation and may well already be developing some practises that help you.  The danger here is that we procrastinate – we spend our time trying to find the practise that is perfect for us; or we read endless books about the benefits of contemplation or the science behind it; or we get bogged down in the theology; or we make a very long list about all the reasons why we can’t get started!  So, begin by recognising that you have started, and that Love dwells within you and is with you.  You are not alone.

Everyone is different, and though some have given very particular guidelines on how to meditate or express gratitude or pray, in the end what we do is up to us.  And what each of us do will differ, and that doesn’t matter.  There are no hard and fast rules here, but there is lots of wisdom to draw on and that can be helpful.  Any wisdom I have about getting started is gleaned from others: here let me share some of the basics that I have found helpful.

A first step is to slow down.  Our tendency in modern life is to fill our life completely to the brim – our lives become so full that we end up rushing from appointment to appointment; grabbing food on the go; squeezing in a conversation here and a visit there.  The answer to ‘how are you?’ has become ‘busy’, and often that is seen as a very positive thing.  In fact, if you can’t reel off a list of all the things you have been doing recently you can be made to feel a bit like a failure.  For some of us the Covid lockdowns created space and time – many of the things we had filled our lives with came to a standstill: we were released from that prison of activity and focused on what really mattered.  It was a lesson:  we need to slow down.  We need to eat a meal and really experience what it tastes like.  We need to have a conversation and really listen.  We need to pause before moving on to the next thing on the list.  Here we have a battle with our ego – we feel better about ourselves when we feel needed; when we have something special to talk about; when we can be the centre of attention.  But if we are to slow down we will have to let go of these things.  How often have you heard people claim that they don’t have enough time?  As you read this are you already thinking: I don’t have time to slow down?  We will have to ‘deny ourselves’ and let the ego die a little.  The truth of the matter is that I cannot magically make time.  To find the time to slow down, I am going to have to die a little.  I am going to have to let go of some things and consider what I want to hold onto. And whatever it is that you’re holding onto really tightly – that you really don’t want to let go of – can you try to open your hand a little?  Can you hold it more lightly?  Can you open your hand and let whatever it is rest there instead of gripping it?  When we let go, when we loosen our grip, we create space.  When we slow down, we open up gaps.  Gaps into which God can climb; space into which God can grow.

How tempting it is to fill the space we open up with noise.  I have enjoyed my own company most of my life.  Or maybe I have thought I have.  Because what I have enjoyed is listening to the radio or reading a book.  It is so easy to fill our lives with information and communication.  We no longer just have the radio or books, we have tv and podcasts and emails and Facebook and Instagram…  As soon as we make space there are literally hundreds of things waiting to invade that space and fill it.  We easily fill up the space that God could have climbed into.  To keep that space open we need the ‘disciplines’ of silence, stillness and solitude.

The wonderful gifts of silence, stillness and solitude can be taken at your own pace and according to your own need.  For myself I know that I have only dipped my toe into each – there is so much more there.  Because these three are expansive, free and freeing.  It is important to recognise that it is not easy for everyone to find a place of silence or stillness, or to be on their own in solitude – if it is difficult for you try taking the opportunities as and when they arise.  To me these three are like blankets that we can wrap ourselves in and part of the ‘trick’ is to recognise opportunities and take them.  For me days at home were often accompanied by the radio – even when I was not really listening to it – the discipline of leaving the radio off has opened up some silence for me.  Times of solitude have been taken through walking home from work instead of taking the bus or making the most of washing up or doing another chore on my own.  I probably find stillness the biggest challenge which leads us on to ‘meditation’.

Meditation is taking time to be still.  To still not just the body but also the mind.  On a contemplative journey it is a key practise, and there are many books you can read about it and much advice you can find.  My advice would simply be to have a go.  Have a go, remembering that nobody says this is an easy practise.  Don’t judge what happens: don’t think about your failure or success.  To the extent that you can, just be.  Your mind will fill with thoughts, you will find yourself distracted, or you may find yourself asleep.  Forgive yourself, turn back to God, and try again.  But try not to try – just be.  Again, different people will find different things helpful. Some find a sacred word helpful; for others engaging with one particular sense can help to still the mind; for others a mental picture can enable them to let go of thoughts.  I sometimes get a sense of where I am sitting inside of myself – as I relax into meditation I can let myself drop deeper, underneath all the agitation and, sometimes for a moment, the thoughts slip away.  I find I need to let go and purposefully orient myself towards God, towards Love – there is something intentional – I am not ‘switching off’ I am switching on to something divine that is beyond my understanding.

In my own experience spiritual direction has been very helpful.  A spiritual director is there as a facilitator – they do not tell you what to do but facilitate your relationship with God, inside you and around you.  A simple, well ‘managed’ conversation which helps you unpack what is inside you, also enables you to unpack God inside of you.  You can begin to recognise with greater clarity what God is doing in you and around you.  You can gain support and encouragement when you feel a bit lost: helped to find the piece of Light-God-Love that with nourishment will grow.  In many senses then, spiritual direction is not about keeping you on the ‘right path’ but about recognising God around and within you on your journey.  It is not a case of finding the right direction but of waking up to the fact that God is with, and within, you.

Through this contemplative journey our aim is connection.  God is all about connection rather than separation, so one way in which we can connect with God is through connecting with creation. Many of us will have been privileged to visit a place where the beauty of God’s creation is literally awe-inspiring.  The beauty and grandeur of mountains, the power and peace of the ocean, the comfort and company of a wood or forest.  There are times when we are tangibly touched by what we see, and we feel a stirring in our soul.  Not so many of us will have the fortune to live in a place of such beauty, but even if we do familiarity can lead to us taking what is around us for granted.  It is a discipline to find God in creation – to notice the things of beauty all around us and develop an ‘every day awe’ that can draw us closer to the Divine.  When we slow down we have the time to notice the natural world.  We see creation pushing through any spaces our concrete jungle leaves vacant – an echo of the way God will push into the spaces in our souls that we open up.  And of course, each one of us is a creation of God.  We find God through connecting with each other.  Through creating community and having the humility to see God in each other.

Which brings us to our own bodies.  We are ‘fearfully and wonderfully made’.  For all our problems with image, with what we look like, and our health and the impact this has on our lives, we are ‘fearfully and wonderfully made’.  To recognise that I am made by God is to see my body as sacred in some way.  The Bible talks about the body being the ‘temple of the Lord’ and if I believe that God lives inside me then surely that is what my body is.  We can suffer in many different ways physically and when we do we often suffer mentally, spiritually and emotionally as well.  Our body, mind, spirit and soul are all linked which means that when we look after our body that has an impact on our mind, spirit, soul and our emotions.  We need to consider what we consume and what affect that has on our body.  We need to think about our activity, or lack of it.  Our body is a gift, a temple, a creation of God.  I started fasting on a weekly basis to help myself from a physical health point of view: I felt my gut needed a weekly rest.  I can not completely pin down the affect this has had on me spiritually but there is something.  Maybe giving my gut a rest, somehow gives my soul a rest too.  I can’t explain it, but the different elements of our being are one, so it makes sense to me that when I look after one part of myself the others also benefit.  This I know is a common experience – you don’t need to be an athlete or a wholefood guru to know that when you are fit or when you have eaten well, it is not only your body that feels good.  It has an impact on your whole being.

This wholeness is something we need to hold onto as we continue on our contemplative journey.  Modern life and thinking almost necessitates us to compartmentalise our lives, whether that be to think separately about our physical and mental health or keep our spiritual practises within a designated time. God is not like that.  God is about integrating and bringing things together.  Patterns in nature and his creation teach us this – everything has an impact on everything else: everything is connected.  So, it is critical that we do not think of contemplation as something new that we are going to carve out time for and create a new compartment.  Contemplation needs to be integrated into the whole of my life – wherever I am, whatever I am doing – it is more an attitude of mind than a practise.  Through contemplation I will see that God is woven into all the different threads of my life; I will begin to see the patterns he is making; and wake up to the beauty that she is creating that has always been there.