Musing #6: Let feelings be your teacher

How do you feel today? Maybe if you pause for a moment you can tune in and sense that you’re just ok.  Or maybe there’s an anger inside you, or an anxiety or a fear bubbling up.  What do you do with that emotion?  Does it consume you: eat away at you? Or do you consume it – bury it or repress it? Ignore it?

The way I respond to my emotions and feelings differs but what I am finding myself more able to do is to observe them: notice what I am feeling and be aware that it is just that – a feeling.  Feelings come, and feelings go.  An image was given to me of a mountain that stands solidly as storms pass, as snow falls, as sunshine lights up its beauty.  I am the mountain – you are the mountain.  Our emotions are the weather – they come, and they go; sometimes just what we needed, sometimes exactly what we didn’t want; sometimes a storm will last a while but not forever – the storm will pass.  Another day or season will come, and the feeling will be different. 

I find this picture helpful: it speaks to me of the equanimity I find through contemplative practices; it speaks to me of the peace that is beyond understanding.  But I am encouraged not to ignore these emotions.  A different image is found in Rumi’s poem ‘The Guesthouse’. This speaks of us as houses to which all manner of emotions arrive as guests, and his encouragement is to invite these guests in because they have their work to do: they are gifts from the beyond.  And I think, yes, let me listen to how I am feeling – let me welcome that feeling and let it teach me.

Some emotions are painful, and our instinctive reaction is to push them away or to deny them.  But what is that pain trying to communicate to you?  Just as physical pain can alert us to an injury, a danger or a disease, I find myself seeing emotional pain as a pointer to something.  And I want to listen and find what that something is – what is that messenger from beyond trying to say to me?  Is it alerting me to an ‘injury’ that I have suffered or inflicted? Is it aware of a danger that I could prepare for? Or has it seen a habit that is becoming like a disease in me – incapacitating me in some way?

The world is not an easy place to live at the moment with the effects of climate change ever more apparent; and wars; inequalities; violence.  In all this suffering I know I am not the only one who has retreated from the news – it all feels too much.  But something has been nudging me recently to re-think this decision.  I do not wish to sit in the 24-hour wash of news without an awareness of its impact on me.  But I do feel a need to take some time to sit with the news – however horrendous it may be - and feel the emotions that emerge.  Oftentimes my response to the news is one of powerlessness: I don’t know what to do about all that is going wrong in the world at the moment.  I wonder, if I sit with the emotions that the news evokes, will they become my teacher?  If I can welcome those emotions into my guest house what work will they do?

Many of our physical ills result from our attempts to numb ourselves from painful emotions and feelings – numb ourselves from our human reality.  What if we were to stop numbing ourselves, feel the pain and let it teach us?  I honestly don’t know what would happen, but I am confident that it would draw us nearer to the Love that sits at the centre of the universe.  The Love that does not wish us any harm but wishes to transform us and turn our pain into joy.

Photo by Angel Barnes on Unsplash

Rumi’s 'The Guest House' being read: https://fb.watch/pWBz_S7Ujz/